UA-35809113-1


  1. “When I leave my leftovers out all night and have nothing to eat at work the next day.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I leave my leftovers out all night and have nothing to eat at work the next day.”

     
    2. 4 notes


  2. “When I get bored and result to FB stalking exes.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I get bored and result to FB stalking exes.”

     
    3. 7 notes


  3. “When a dude texts me something dirty.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When a dude texts me something dirty.”

     


  4. “When I delete 15 e-mails from flash clothing sale sites every single morning.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I delete 15 e-mails from flash clothing sale sites every single morning.”

     
    5. 2 notes


  5. “When I open Excel.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I open Excel.”

     
    6. 75 notes


  6. “When I used Instragram to filter my boob pic and posted it instead.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I used Instragram to filter my boob pic and posted it instead.”

     
    7. 4 notes


  7. “When a client who is mad at me calls.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When a client who is mad at me calls.”

     
    8. 53 notes


  8. “When my doctor won’t prescribe me Ambien.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When my doctor won’t prescribe me Ambien.”

     
    9. 37 notes


  9. “When I carry 18 bags of groceries in the house by myself.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I carry 18 bags of groceries in the house by myself.”

     
    10. 6 notes


  10. “When I go to the doctor and the nurse not only weighs me, but announces the result.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I go to the doctor and the nurse not only weighs me, but announces the result.”

     
    11. 11 notes


  11. “When I get an e-mail detailing every line of an Excel sheet I fucked up.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I get an e-mail detailing every line of an Excel sheet I fucked up.”

     
    12. 2 notes


  12. “When I let an interoffice call go to voicemail.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When I let an interoffice call go to voicemail.”

     
    13. 14 notes


  13. “When another one of my friends decides to go to grad school.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When another one of my friends decides to go to grad school.”

     
    14. 6 notes


  14. “When someone asks what I think my kids will be like.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When someone asks what I think my kids will be like.”

     


  15. “When someone comes to work sick.” Tweet !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs");

    “When someone comes to work sick.”

     
    16. 3 notes